Everyone has issues. We have our demons. Whatever come snarling to bite your insides, sometimes instead of defending yourself you’re hoping to feel the pain sink in deep into the flesh. Blood. Sometimes blood is what you need to see. Watching them flow out of wounds, drip and stain clothes can be therapeutic.

On other coherent things, I went to see the ortho specialist today. I am recommended for physio. I think it’s about time for these knees to be treated. I remember the first few months in track almost shattered what seemed like bones and tissue at my patella. Let’s grit through the pain I thought, because for some reason this seemed to be the answer I’m looking for. But no.
Facing your deepest fears is a crazy thing. I’m not even sure if they’re just surfacing or have I actually seen everything. If this is only a fraction of a fraction of it, I will never make it through. I guess I never did.

Hello David, just suck it up. There will always be too much damage done. There will always be a better day.


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